Friday, 16 December 2016

You could sense something was different. The atmosphere was electric, it was filled with bewilderment, cluelessness, shock and fear with a bit of excitement. I was sitting with two of my friends in a coffee shop in Damascus and after saying our greetings and asking how each one was doing the logical and natural next topic was about the situation in the country. We weren't able to hide our excitement; I smiled and so did my friends. One of my friends smile didn't last long though and he asked me "how long do you think it's going to last?"

At that point I didn't really think of that. The excitement that we as a people of that country have finally reached that point where we collectively had enough with it all, was all I was thinking about. I thought about the prospects of finally getting to have some of our freedoms and finally being able to call out the corrupt for the corruption that they have dragged the country into and to be able to fix it and build it was all I was thinking about. A quick thought of the question and how things were going add to that recent experiences in other countries and I said "I guess 6 more months".

My friend looked at me and said "its going to take much more and we are going to suffer a lot before we get rid of this regime".

Five years have passed since then and I am in a country I never thought I would have ever lived in. I've been through things like most Syrians but nothing like the pain and suffering a lot of Syrians had to go through. I left, when I didn't really want to leave but maybe (and this is what I tell myself) I wasn't destined to be there now; maybe I'm supposed to be doing something else and help in other ways that are different from what I have imagined myself doing at the beginning of it all. But I still have to figure that out.

I've thought long about starting to write again on this blog, but because of personal circumstances I couldn't. I still don't think that is a good idea but I'm planning on doing it anyways.

5 years have passed and today everything I believed in before it all happened just seems right now like the biggest lie I have ever believed in. Those that I believed were righteous have turned out to be the most wicked, those that I hoped will stand by the people of Syria have turned their backs; people that I have trusted and always thought as having the highest of morals and conscious turned out to be cold and hard hearted.

5 years have passed and Syrians have divided into a thousand factions when they were two at the beginning, those that were with and those that were against. I don't believe there is a short term solution without one of the sides losing totally to the other and unless that happens more people will have sacrificed their lives and a lot more will have died for no reason.

5 years have passed, and with every heartbreaking news I hear or see I still believe that the revolution will go on and Syrians will get what they want and what they rightly deserve. Freedom, Dignity, Justice.